RESOLVING THE ISSUE AND REBUILDING TRUST—PART I

Maria had many questions. She wanted to know exactly how and when the affair started as well as the basics of what transpired both sexually and emotionally. She also wanted to know if there were other women in his life. George hated having this conversation. Sometimes he wanted to give short, blunt answers: “Yes, we had a lot of sex.” And he also found himself wanting to tell Maria more than she wanted to know. “Many women are attracted to me,” he bragged. Although it took a long time, and many discussions, George was ultimately able to answer his wife’s questions in a factual, direct manner. George had had three affairs over the course of their marriage.

Brian wanted to know exactly who the other guy was. How did he and Ashley meet? Where and when did they hook up? Was he attractive? Ashley struggled to respond; she didn’t want to hurt Brian’s feelings. She really didn’t want to tell Brian everything, especially the fact that Alex was extremely handsome. But realizing she had to come clean, she told the truth.

Hannah wanted to know if Ethan had sexual feelings for Stephanie. Because he had already lied to her and didn’t want to have this conversation, he stuck to his original story and accused Hannah of being her typical self—an overreactor.

And Zachary wanted to know what else Jacob had been hiding from him. Jacob just shook his head in a sign of frustration. When a partner refuses to cooperate, it tells you everything you need to know.

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