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tcole
Tim Cole
Keymaster

Your questions about a partner’s sexual history are realistic. If you’re going to get involved with someone, it helps to make that decision based on the person’s past relational experiences.

The tone and manner in which you ask those questions is important. It helps to ask such questions in the context of a natural conversation about getting to know each other better. It’s also important for you to be willing to answer those questions as well.

I should also point out that it’s common for people to be less than forthcoming about answers to such questions — especially, for individuals with a concerned or cool style of attachment. People with a concerned style of attachment are more likely to tell a partner what they think the person wants to hear. And people with a cool style of attachment are more likely to feel that their past is no one’s business but their own.

Hope that helps.

Tim

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